Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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