I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
i think i just lost a toe
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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