Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
