I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
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