whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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