You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Please, let me fuck your mom
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
