So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
