I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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