thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
