i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
