My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
