Someone shit on the floor
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
