problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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