Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
