I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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