ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
