Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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