You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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