I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
