Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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