you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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