its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I could fuck to npr.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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