I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I know her cup size but not her name....
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
