I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
