PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
