Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
