I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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