David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
