Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
