is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
