where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
