Duck Duck Cougar?
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
