I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Randomize
