No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
