3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
