i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I deserve this hangover.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
