just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
