My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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