I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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