so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
