Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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