so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
