but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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