i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
