apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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