What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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