Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
