i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
