we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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