dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
